No killing moths or pouring boiling water onto ants

fas·cist (fash-ist) n. A reactionary or dictatorial person.101 Ways to Annoy a Fascist By The Deth Vegetable 56) Spray paint MAKE LOVE NOT WAR on his pit-bull.57) Tell him to go fuck himself.58) Tell him to go fuck himself with a limber dick.59) Tell him you are a member of the John Birch Society and that you are investigating reports of him being a pinko.60) Wear a t-shirt reading JOE MCARTHY WAS A WEENIE.

Wow. o.o

Who is Joe Mcarthy?

Alright, here’s the deal kiddies…
–Most people are just a little too gay to get anything about this, so if one of those people is in here.. they should leave. yes. Now. Anyway, here it be. Oh, note: I’m in journalism… we put out the school newspaper. This was one of my articles for the month of March.

Response to “Self-Mutilation”
Just recently I stumbled on an article written by a friend about self-mutilation. I wanted to reply in some way, but I really didn’t know how, so I thought I’d just speak on the topic. Most people wouldn’t realize it, but I am mildly associated with this area of activity; cutting, burning, running myself into things, punching doors and walls and windows, putting my hand into boiling water… name something and I’ve probably done it. Branches of my group of friends do different things within this painful arena: some burn symbols into their skin, or carve them in with sewing needles, a few will go through the house and find pills – any pills they can get their hands on – and take them all together to provide some kind of temporary fix away from the distress they are feeling, some are so overcome by frustration or sorrow or rage that they turn and attack their door or wall or bed stand. I have fought it for a very long time and it still seems like almost nothing can set me free. It is definitely not something I recommend.

Although it is far from being the best way to relieve stress, you absolutely cannot sit and scoff at us or be angry with us. For some people, like me, it really seems to be the only way. Granted there is a lot of pain that comes to play on top of everything later, but at the precise moment, you’re really not thinking about it, and when it does come, you never seem to realize it. For the time, it just feels wonderful.

Contrary to what an excessive amount of people will say or think, as the ‘youth’ we do get a considerable amount of stressors (tangible and intangible). Whether they’re real or not they still exist to the people they effect. Anyone trying to understand a person who is hurting themselves must remember this. Us also being who we are almost constantly feel as if we aren’t being given the chance to control our lives – and let’s ask ourselves quickly, are we? Cutting or burning or anything in the wide array of these things is a way for us to control something that nobody else is… a way to put our hands on the steering wheel. Most often nobody realizes that we are doing it, therefore nobody even begins to try to control it. If they ever do, they won’t admit that they just don’t know what to do and so they react in every possible wrong way. There are hundreds, probably thousands of people that suffer this kind of abuse. Words never help, but something that does is trying to make yourself fully realize that you are not the only one. Don’t attempt to downplay the severity of these kinds of things – it is always a big deal no matter who you are or what you’re doing – but if you are looking for them, there is always going to be someone who knows how you feel. From my experience I give my sworn testimony, there isn’t much greater of a relief than finding somebody who can understand you (or will at least try) and will listen to the things you have to say without verbally victimizing you. If you, like many others, cannot convince your unconscious of this, don’t feel like you’ve done something wrong. Most people just can’t. You’re unconscious is a stubborn three-year old that’s in love with its blanket.

I believe that possibly the most important thing we should all try to do is talk. It probably doesn’t matter about what or who to, although it should probably be somebody you trust, just talk. Talk about how you’re feeling, talk about things you think, talk about what you saw when you looked out your window… hey, talk about what you think of marijuana being made legal. Anything as long as it’s making you feel good. Or maybe it’s something that’s been making you feel bad. If you think getting it off your chest or mind or *insert something that carries things* is going to help you out later on, talk about it. All it really takes sometimes is one interesting word to start a conversation that covers everything from what grapes grow on to how far out the stars could go. Or maybe just “w00t.”

Okay, alright, the ending isn’t the greatest, oh fuck it. It’s fine. Leave me a message if you’re less lazy than me and tell me what you think,



~ by Ashlee on April 3, 2004.

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